19:20 BST - Oooh, hark at all this. A lovely shiny new terry section for the football business, complete with controversial back-to-front updates. Inexpensive progress, that's what they call this.19:25 BST - And we start our trawl through all things Euro 2008 at the St. Jakob Park Stadium in Basel, with the opening semi final between two teams that have proved you can never ever write anyone off. Germany remain the favourites for the tournament overall, 6/4 with some unnamed betting companies, while Turkey are outsiders in every sense of the word, 12/1 being somewhat "out there" odds, especially when there is only four teams left.
19.30 BST - It should be pointed out that I have a slight vested interest in this game, being as Patty HQ is located in a fairly Turk-heavy area of north London. This run of theirs has given fantastic entertainment, not just on the pitch, with last-ditch turnarounds aplenty, but around these streets, as the mass of Turkish fans celebrate every win by driving up and down the streets, tooting their car horns and waving flags from windows with nationalistic fervour. It gets annoying after about three hours of it when you're trying to grab some sleep, but it certainly puts England's own standard celebrations into perspective, which usually revolves around standing outside pubs loudly glassing each other in the face.
19.35 BST - But then, that is not to say that I won't be able to bring myself to smile at a Germany win either. There may be some "history" between them and England, but it seems to have become just that in recent years, history. Now English fans have a new least-favourite country, as Portugal knocked us out of the last two championships we've actually managed to qualify for. And it was slightly refreshing/disconcerting (delete as appropriate) to see most of the country cheering for Germany when they beat Portugal in the last round, despite what the Ronaldo-centric ITV coverage would have wanted you to do.
The teams:
Germany: Lehmann, Friedrich, Mertesacker, Metzelder, Lahm, Hitzlsperger, Rolfes, Schweinsteiger, Ballack, Podolski, Klose.
Turkey: Rustu, Sarioglu, Topal, Zan, Balta, Aurelio, Kazim-Richards, Altintop, Akman, Boral, Senturk.
19.45 BST - So no Frings for Germany, and barely anyone for Turkey. I've been afflicted by a late power cut, which is making all this a bit hectic.
1 min - The Germans get the game underway, after a bit of pre-match anti-racism niceities from the two captains.
4 mins - Quiet start this. Turkey's Balta gets a cross in, but it is ferreted away by the German defenders.
The Elbow - "I thought Turkey were going to have to play Fatih Terim in goal at one point."
6 mins - "Walthamstow-born" Kazim has a pop from 20-odd yards, easily saved by Lehmann. Nothing much happening for Germany early doors.
8 mins - Lordy. Big mess up from Philip Lahm and Turkey's Hamit (I think, I wasn't really watching) has a chance. Lehmann stands up to the shot and Germany get it cleared. They look ruffled, the Germans.
The Elbow - "Colin Kazim-Richards is making a late bid for player of the tournament."
11 mins - I've calmed down a bit now. The Germans haven't mind. A Gokhan cross is hacked away by Metzelder.
13 mins - Chaos in the German penalty area. Aurelio chipped the ball in, Semih goes up for the ball and it falls to Kazim, who rattles the bar from 15 yards!
16 mins - Free kick to Germany as Boral fouls Klose. Easily caught by Rustu, who looks like a cross between Ming the Merciless and a WWF wrestler.
17 mins - Better from the Germans. Cross from the right is just ahead of Ballack, but he nearly latches onto the rebound and Turkey's defence scramble it behind.
19 mins - Replays of the Kazim shot are eye-rattlingly epic. That's the Walthamstow spirit, that is. German coach Joachim Low looks like he's a minute away from finding a cushion to hide behind.
22 mins - GOAL! Germany 0 - 1 Turkey (Boral) - Incredible, but it has been coming. A deep Turkey cross is sent goalwards, it comes back off the bar and falls to the feet of Ugur Boral, who taps it under a despairing Lehmann. Again: Incredible.
The Elbow - "I'd love to know what Lehmann was doing."
24 mins - Yep, the ball just went under him, and it was Kazim who had the initial shot off the bar. I now make that 12 minutes that Turkey have led during games at this tournament. And they're still pressing, as Semih sends a deflected shot just wide.
26 mins - GOAL! Germany 1 - 1 Turkey (Schweinsteiger) - Wouldn't you know it? Podolski gets the ball on the left in a rare German foray forward, he sends a low cross in and Bastian Schweinsteiger got there ahead of the Turkish defence to prod it in. To be blunt, that is undeserved.
29 mins - There's the German tails up anyway, they're pressing the Turks now. A Hitzelsperger free kick comes to nothing, and then Klose torments the Turkish defence with a bit of trickery, but his shot is blocked.
31 mins - Mad Jens is having a nightmare. He comes off his line for a deep Hamit free kick, and has to tip it over the bar to prevent the mother of all embarrassments. To cap it off, he flaps at the resulting corner.
34 mins - Great chance. A Turkey passing move breaks down, and a quick pass sees Podolski released down the left channel, but he fires over rather than squaring it to the arriving Klose. Should be 2-1 to the Germans, really.
36 mins - Bowing to stereotypes, the cameramen focus on some faces in the crowd. Some attractive ladies with painted faces for the Turks, two large gentlemen with dodgy beards for Germany.
38 mins - Kazim is fouled on the right of the penalty area, Topal's free kick is incredibly driven straight at goal from an acute angle, This time Lehmann punches clear with confidence. The wall was poor, prompting a joke from John Motson about "German walls". Hmm.
40 mins - Nasty clash of heads here. Akman and Rolfes get treatment off the pitch for a bloody head. It's end to end, here, Kazim has a shot blocked, then Klose gets the ball tangled up in a shooting position, and finally Sarioglu fires just wide at the other end. Cracking game, this.
The Elbow - "Motty seems to think Kazim-Richards is everywhere."
42 mins - I'm mentioning him a lot too, if Motty's like me, his fingers are too busy to keep up with the Turkish players. Rolfes is still off the pitch, and he's not coming back on.
45 mins - Actually, he is coming back on. Frings was possibly coming on, which would have been a gamble given his rib injury. Into stoppage time here.
HALF TIME - Germany 1 - 1 Turkey
20.40 BST - A breathless first half then, cracking football from Turkey, and the Germans occasionally looking dangerous on the break. The last game in this tournament not to go to extra time was Germanys win over Portugal back in the first quarter final.
20.45 BST - A really weird half time feature from the Beeb. Zinedine Zidane and Arsene Wenger discussing the Russian team. Not sure why.
46 mins - We're back underway in Basel, and Frings is now on for the injured Rolfes.
48 mins - Quieter start to the second half. Though Turkey still not looking like the underdogs they're supposed to be.
50 mins - Mertesacker stupidly gives the ball away in his own half, and Semih so nearly latches onto the attempted through ball.
51 mins - Woah, big moment for Massimo Busacca the referee, Lahm goes down right on the edge of the penalty area for Germany, he waves away the penalty claims, provoking fury from the German bench, and whistles from the fans. Replays show a clattering foul right on the edge of the area from Sabri. It should have been something, even just a free kick.
53 mins - Expert reffy analysis from The Elbow says it was just outside the area. Semih goes into the referees book for a clumsy challenge. Getting a bit dirty out there.
55 mins - Germany looking menacing now. Podolski lays the ball to Hitzelsperger on the edge of the area, but the midfielder with the powerful foot, erm, powers it over the bar.
57 mins - A laughable overreaction from Mertesacker after another challenge from Semih. And now Ballack is clattered over from behind right on the edge of the Turkish area. Dangerous free kick, and Ballack will take. And it's rubbish.
58 mins - Erm, the BBC TV pictures have frozen, and now we've been patched into the Radio 5 Live radio commentary. This could get difficult to describe.
60 mins - This is a disaster for the Beeb. A big error page is now on our screens, as John Murray and Chris Waddle describe it for the radio listeners. This is the televisual equivalent of the BSOD, I reckon.
62 mins - There was a thunderstorm in the area, so I'm assuming a lightning bolt has knocked out the BBC pictures. According to Mr Murray, Turkey are pressing around the Germany area. This is silly.
64 mins - We have pictures! Hallelujah! I don't think we've missed much, by the looks of things. The BBC on-screen clock appears to have perished in the storm.
The Elbow - "I want 5 Live back."
65 mins - Hitzelsperger gets into a crossing position, but he balloons his cross behind the Turkish goal.
67 mins - Turkey are hardly pressing here. Ugur gets into a crossing position on the right, but there is no, count them, no Turkish players in the penalty area to aim for. They somehow win a corner, which is easily cleared.
70 mins - Colin, Colin, Colin. Tut, tut, tut. Mr Kazim of Walthamstow bamboozles a couple of German defenders, to break into the German area, and then just goes down like a sack of spuds under minimal pressure. Pointless stuff, really.
72 mins - This game is getting lost in the moment in the second half. Two sides too cautious to commit men forwards, and it is suffering because of it. Having said that, Lehmann holds a Turkey shot, and then Hitzelsperger has a decent go from 20 yards, which fizzes past Rustu's left-hand post.
75 mins - Into the last 15 minutes of normal time. I'll be honest, a winner isn't looking likely any time soon, but then you never can tell in this tournament.
77 mins - By Rustu's beard! The pictures have gone again. According to Alan Green on 5 Live, Klose just headed wide.
78 mins - GOAL! Germany 2 - 1 Turkey (Klose) - I don't believe it. The pictures have missed the goal. Apparently, a cross came in, Rustu had a silly flap, and Klose headed into an empty net.
80 mins - We now have the TV pictures and the radio commentary. This is ridiculous. Turkey have come from behind late on in each of their last three games, and they need to do so again. A change for the Turks, Mehmut on for Akman.
82 mins - Germany looking to wrap things up. Decent ball from Frings releases Podolski, whose low cross is gathered by Rustu. We see a replay of the goal, and Rustu flapped horribly at that. Shame.
83 mins - Another change for Turkey. Gokdeniz on for Boral. A deep cross from the Turks goes nowhere. Desperate times now.
85 mins - GOAL! Germany 2 - 2 Turkey (Semih) - What a team, this Turkey team. Never write them off. Sarioglu with a run into the area, low ball across and the Semih flick somehow beats Lehmann at his near post.
The Elbow - "Horrible defending by Lahm, horrible goalkeeping by Lehmann."
89 mins - Late drama. Schweinsteiger, who has done almost nothing since his goal, squares for Hitzelsperger, but he can't control it. Then Turkey break and Semih shoots wide.
90 mins - GOAL! Germany 3 - 2 Turkey (Lahm) - And that is surely that. Lahm plays a lovely 1-2 with Hitzelsperger and fires past Rustu from the left side of the penalty area. Surely Turkey can't come back again?
The Elbow - "Usually I'd say that's that...but it's Turkey"
90+1 mins - Three minutes added time, and Kazim is off for Tumer. One last throw of the dice for the Turks. Jansen on for Klose for the Germans too.
90+3 mins - A late free kick for Turkey, after Ballack commits a foul on Tumer. Tumer steps up to take...and it is a dreadful free kick. Around ten foot over the crossbar.
FULL TIME - Germany 3 - 2 Turkey
21.40 BST - There'll be no party on the streets outside Patty HQ tonight. The brave run of the Turkish side comes to an end, and Germany have somehow won this to net a place in the final on Sunday. The drama.
21.45 BST - Inconsolable Turkish players litter the pitch as Germany celebrate. A simple "bloody Germans" comment from The Elbow. Nothing like a bit of old fashioned Englishness, eh? You have to feel for the Turks, but in the end, they were beaten at their own last-minute winner game.
21.50 BST - So, a cracking game then. It went horribly off the boil in the middle of the second half, but the rest was pure sporting drama. This has all been fun. We should do it again some time. How about tomorrow? For the second semi-final? Ah, go on then.
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