09.51 – Good morning chaps and chappettes and welcome to the middle of nowhere for the Abu Dhabi morning practice session.
The big overnight news is that Bruno Senna has officially signed for Campos for 2010, something I predicted (bow to my barely superior intellect) on an article I did yesterday.
The deal looked in jeopardy for an hour or so after it appeared Senna had done a Darren Bent and gobbed off on Twitter when perhaps he shouldn’t have, but all was well when Campos woke up in the night to confirm the deal that is sure to shake up the grid in ways that can only annoy Lewis Hamilton and Fernando Alonso next year when lapping a greater percentage of the field.
But to the racing and it’s looking like McLaren have the strongest package this week, with Heikki pulling his finger out far too late for a 2010 contract with fastest time yesterday followed by his team mate with the banana helmet. Red Bull also look there or there abouts, with Bwemmy impressive once again – expect him to make an arse of qualifying and consequently the race.
My personal man to watch this weekend is Kamui Kobayashi, who is proving to be as quick as he is fearless/borderline mental, running in the top 5 yesterday. Let’s hope he keeps it up as F1 without a crazy Japanese driver is like an F1 without Bernie moaning about Silverstone’s urinals or a know-nothing pretentious celebrity giving an inane interview before the Monaco GP – it just wouldn’t be F1.
09.57 – As you will probably know unless you’ve been living under a rock and believe the most recent champion is Jim Clark, this weekend’s Abu Dhabi GP is the first ever on a brand new track. What do I think of it? Well as I’ve told friends and family, you know a track is probably no great sheikhs – chuckle, chuckle – when the most interesting feature is the pitlane.
Whilst the layout doesn’t look altogether inspiring, the setting is pretty spectacular, particularly the way the race will start in the day and sweep through twilight and into the night. That should distract me for 2 minutes away from the total lack of on track action, then.
Furthermore, I won’t bandwagon on with every other F1 journo out there and predict an accident in the underground pitlaney thing, but I will say there’ll be a few close shaves on the exit where Tilke has like a genius designed it so the exit blend line is right into a 150mph racing line. Wonderful.
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10.08 – So the cars are hitting the track now for their installation lap and as they creep down the tunnel pitlane I feel an urge to book an Etihad flight – Kimi’s Etihad shod Ferrari creeps through the pitlane covered in Etihad adverts. You know we’re in the Middle East.
Nobody’s done any proper laps yet, it’s just installation lap time. The BBC’s discussing how apparently Silverstone are close to a deal with Bernie, as we’re treated to an incredible flyover shot of the Abu Dhabi circuit which brilliantly shows the difference between itself and Silverstone – incredible facilities and very pretty, but a shocking layout. Apply a mirror on that description to get my opinion on Silverstone.
They were in the 1:41s yesterday and I expect anyone with talent to be in the 1:3*’s come qualifying.
10.14 – Good grief, I’ve just seen Ferrari World for the first time in my life. It’s supposed to be some sort of Ferrari theme park, but the thing is enormous. It’s 1km long and housed in a ridiculous dome, a real stunning piece of architecture and in all honesty a waste of money. A superb two fingers to the recession.
Nobody’s doing anything, so don’t worry you’re not missing anything. Lucas di Grassi is on the pitwall dicking about on Twitter, Timo Glock’s looking bored out of his brains talking to a journo and Lewis Hamilton’s on the wall trying out his latest stand up routine with Martin Whitmarsh who is roaring in his Barry White deep tone. Maybe Lewis suggested Kimi should join them and be on more money than him, ha, ha, ha, er ........ ummm.
10.22 – Right, it only took a quarter of the session but we’re finally setting laptimes. Everyone’s on track and the laptimes are tumbling with every lap.
Oh God, I thought we’d left such juvenile behaviour behind in Brazil – yes, I’m talking about the regular shot of Felipe Massa on the pit wall giving forced smiles and thumbs up. Maybe he’s just watching Fisichella and is so happy that there is no chance on earth Massa will be turfed out in return for Giancarlo.
Heikki has a big moment in the mid sector and he runs wide but it’s no biggy – he’s P1.
10.29 – Anthony Davidson makes the good point that setting these cars up for this race is going to be a nightmare given the change in daylight during the race – how a car handles in the light of day will be very different to the cooler conditions of the night, so hopefully that will spice things up in the race.
Luca di Montezemelo is on the pitwall, he obviously scraped together a few pennies from the Ferrari expenses department to turn up for more than one race this season. He looks very worried about something – did he accidentally give Fisichella a 10 year contract?
Lewis Hamilton’s just smashed the ball out of the park with a lap time over one second faster than everyone else and he’s going faster again this lap. Current top 10:
Hamilton, SUT, World Champion 2009, Bwemmy, Bobby K, Liuzzi, Kobayashi (Yay), Kovalainen, Trulli, Kimi
10.38 – I’m laughing my head off here, Luca’s still marching round the Ferrari pits obviously highly stressed about something as Piero Ferrari (he who looks freakishly like his Dad) looks on with a face off “would just calm down you daft bugger.”
Nothing exciting on track, Hamilton is obviously the class of the field because Red Bull have managed to get themselves 2nd and 3rd with Webber and SebVet respectively but they’re still a mile away from the 2008 champion.
For those of you who don’t have pictures, I believe it’s about 1430 at Abu Dhabi, so it’s bright skies, dry (duh) and completely clear. I believe when qualifying comes around the skyline will change.
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10.48 – Nick Heidfeld shows his confusion at how Kubica is that far ahead of him on the grid, probably not helping his contract negotiations for 2010 as at the moment he’s going to be jobless.
Patty’s 2nd favourite driver Bwemmy pops up to P1 – can the Swiss kid hang onto it for once this season or will Toyota shaft him at the death again? Current top 10:
Bwemmy, Lewis, SUT, SebVet, Bobby K, Kobayashi, Kimi, Nicooooo, Heikki, Liuzzi
10.53 – EMAIL! Our old pal Yase Hage has emailed in, so G’day to Yase. He wants to know why Algie hasn’t bothered to do a lap yet. Well I can tell you that although he is a child, even his bedtime is later than 2pm, so he is actually awake and in the pitlane. However, his car has got hydraulic problems, chronic ones too as he won’t be able to set a lap time at all this session. He should be fine for qualifying and shouldn’t incur any sort of grid penalty, but he’ll be missing the track time, particularly since Bwemmy is showing how capable the Toro Rosso is this weekend as he stays in 1st.
Track’s gone quiet now, nobody’s really improving. I would imagine a lot of drivers are making some final tweaks with a view to going out in the final 5 minutes for a qualifying simulation on the soft tyres. 7 minutes remaining.
11.05 – SESSION OVER. Jenson Button with 25 seconds goes P1 with a 1:40:625 ... and Lewis Hamilton can’t match him, he’s 0.002 off and goes 2nd. Boobens sandwiches Lewis with 3rd as Grosjean endured a nightmare succession of spins, it doesn’t look good for him to get a job next year. Final top 10:
Button, Lewis, Boobs, Bwemm, Heidfeld (redeemed), Heikki, Trulli, Bobby K, SUT, Kimi.
So that concludes the practice sessions of the inaugural Abu Dhabi Grand Prix. Lewis Hamilton is obviously very quick indeed and he’s my tip for pole, despite Buttons’ resurgent pace. Join us again in a couple of hours for qualifying with myself or The Foot, The Head, The Elbow – I’ve got absolutely no idea who’ll be playing Murray for qualifying. Ciao!
Haha just before I sign off, Luca is seen mouthing off to a Sheikh in the back of the Ferrari pits, that’s one unhappy Italian today and best of all, nobody – not even Luca - knows why. Definitely my favourite remaining team boss.
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