Ferrari's record still stuck in a groove
One thing that you can say about Luca di Montezemolo is that he is not a man who finds himself being overly concerned about the possibility of repeating old material. Which means that he and PW are really kindred spirits. Arf.
This week, Ferrari's el presidente has stirred up another round of Ferrari-centric whining, based around the same stuff they always whine about. Namely the way that the sport won't let them spend any of their lovely money, and the fact that the sport won't let them flog an old chassis to HRT to try and cover some of the costs associated with being allowed to spend all their lovely money.
"We race not just for the publicity it brings us but above all to carry out advanced research aimed at all aspects of our road cars," he bellowed, "What is not so good is that 90 per cent of performance is now based exclusively on aerodynamics and another negative is that ours is the only sport where no testing is allowed."
And on the third cars chestnut, he added: "We believe the interest of the fans, media and sponsors could increase if there is a bigger number of competitive cars on track rather than cars that are two or three seconds off the pace, being lapped after just a few laps."
Naturally, of course, the whole thing was then wrapped up in a thinly-veiled 'Ferrari to quit F1' threat, a threat that has been used so often over the last few years to try and stop everything from budget caps through to FOM trying to change Sebastien Buemi's photo on the pre-race grid line-up graphics that it has pretty much been rendered entirely ineffective.
"If Formula 1 still wants Ferrari it must change and go back to being at the cutting edge of research, while always keeping an eye on costs," di Montezemolo warned, refusing to specifically say that the team would take their ball home in a huff if their demands weren't met, but certainly implied that there may well be some ball-retention tactics utilised in the future.
Oddly, the team appeared to quickly admit that Crazy Luca had gone a bit far with his comments, and immediately fired off a version of their rarely-coherent 'Horse Whisperer' column to clarify that: "The words 'leave' or 'ultimatum' did not even feature in his pronouncement...Montezemolo spoke in a totally constructive fashion, which is usually the case with the President of a company that has always been in F1 and who has the future well being of the greatest form of motorsport so close to his heart."
Ah, ok, so they're not really planning to leave after all, just heavily imply that Formula One had some "constructive" work to do in order to keep them interested. Constructive work that basically involves doing a series of things that Ferrari wants. And you can't really say fairer than that, can you?
Lesser Seb hits back
Remember Sebastien Bourdais? Everyone's favourite broody bespectacled Frenchman became famous as the first semi-respectable Formula One driver to have his career ruined by life alongside the mercurial talent of Sebastian Vettel.
But as well as being famous for being the less-impressive driver at Toro Rosso during his time in the sport, not only compared to Vettel but also compared to Sebastien 'likely to never be a two-time world champion' Buemi, Bourdais was famous for his ability to excuse his way out of any situation.
Every disappointing performance or miserable failure could easily be blamed on something, or someone else, and despite leaving the sport midway through 2009 to concentrate on being the third or fourth best driver in the Peugeot sportscar line-up, he seems to have retained that ability, if his latest comments are anything to go by.
"In the first third of the season we were equally strong," he insisted this week when asked about his time with Vettel in 2008, "Then we got the new car and Toro Rosso did not have the capacity to develop it specifically for one driver." Chalk up one for 'It was the team's fault I wasn't quick'.
And there's more: "We both had problems with our crew, with the mechanics speaking little English. For me it was worse because I had a family at home and couldn't spend my little bit of spare time learning Italian." So the team was to blame, as was the fact that nobody spoke English (or presumably French).
Still, his comments to Auto Bild weren't all about making excuses, and to his credit he was glowing in his praise of Vettel. After all, the better he makes him sound, the more impressive his relative failure then becomes.
"What Sebastian can do, even with an extremely fast car that is difficult to control, is simply drive around problems," he explained, "His car control is exceptional, and it really stands out if the car or the conditions are difficult."
And cheerily, his outlook for the future of Formula One is one of unrivalled dominance for the driver that he once proved to be only slightly less good than: "People groan about the days of Schumacher's dominance, but I say that the Vettel era could be worse."
And if one person knows a thing or two about angrily groaning about stuff, it's Sebastien Bourdais.
Quote of the Week
"As a Formula 1 commentator I'm so pleased Virgin are changing name next year. I have a mental red alert every time I mention their car in close action." - Sky's The BBC's Martin Brundle welcomes the fact that there are no potential double entendres associated with describing a driver "coming up fast behind a Marussia".
News and Rumours
- Nico Rosberg has denied speculation that he has recently visited the Ferrari team's headquarters, amidst a half-hearted late-season rumour that he might be set to switch to the Italian team in place of Felipe Massa. "This is all nonsense. I was not at Maranello," he blustered, adding optimistically that: "My dream is to win with the Silver Arrows."
- According to reports, this year's Young Driver Test is as much about teams drumming up a bit of extra cash as it is trying to find new driving talent. German publication Auto Motor und Sport have suggested that midfield teams have made up to 300,000 Euros a time by flogging their test drives to the likes of GP2 randommers Fabio Leimer, Max Chilton, Stefano Coletti and Dani Clos.
- Red Bull boss Christian Horner has confirmed that Sebby Vettel has apologised for his decision to ignore calls from the team to slow down at the end of the Indian GP, choosing to go for a fastest lap instead. "He apologised to me for his little show, but Sebastian is reasonable. I don't think he was going to the limit," Horner shrugged, "I think he just wanted to do something for his statistics."
- According to finance bods Bloomberg, NewsCorp's attempt to buy F1 might not be as dead in the water as first suspected. An unnamed source from within the company told the business experts that NewsCorp and their backers Exor are working on a "5 to 10 year business plan" prior to deciding on whether to make a formal bid or not.
- And a high-tech analysis of pit stop times in 2011, carried out using a stopwatch and MS Excel, has confirmed that RBR have been the fastest tyre changers in the West, and indeed the East, in 2011. A report confirms that RBR have had the faster overall pit stops at more races than any other team this year, followed by Mercedes, McLaren and Force India.
Shameless Patty Links
- Patty's preview of the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix is here, and you can follow all of our coverage of the penultimate round of the 2011 F1 season with our index page here.
- And our live coverage of the Abu Dhabi weekend starts at 08.50 BST with FP1 from the Yas Marina track.
- For one final time in 2011, Patty will also be covering the sportscar fun from the Intercontinental Le Mans Cup this weekend. The final round in Zhuhai is previewed here.
- The Ear takes a look at how the F1 calendar might evolve in the future, with his Six of the Best...Possible new F1 races feature here.
- The Head pays tribute to the brilliance of Alex Zanardi here.
- Keep up with all the latest F1 stories with Patty's news section.
- Tweet Patty, or email This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it with thoughts or cancellation requests.
Yours on time again, we're as scared as you are-ingly,
Patty Weekly
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